And there wasnt an accident or anything, just traffic. It takes longer by bus from Hoboken or Secaucus to my office.). Did someone like try to make it that flat? That is going 11 miles. rt commute, it would definitely shave time off, but it would only be workable if you LOVE bikes. If this job allows you the finances/time to travel, do things you love then its something you have to take into account. It might take a little more effort to work it out, but it absolutely can be done. Your boyfriend can move to you this time. OP, I saw youre putting in notice good luck! I was in the same situation when I started my job, thankfully I can now work at home part of the time. Maybe just for a week to try it out and see how you feel. Oh shit. The other parent leaves a little later and drops off the kid, but works later. should we give extra sick days to employees who cant work from home? is so funny (someone in the film thinks building freeways will make traffic jams a thing of the past). My 12-mile commute takes an hour. Taking the train or local Staten Island bus, to the Staten Island ferry, to the Manhattan subway, could easily take two hours from south-shore Staten Island to midtown Manhattan if a subway was delayed or the ferry was running a modified schedule. And if you paid extra for the express bus, and there was an accident jamming up one of the highways or bridges it literally could take shorter to fly from JFK to Florida than to travel 15 or so miles from Staten Island to Manhattan. oof..s that I got about once a day for my first month. Luckily she was a low key kid who enjoyed listening to music. Then I would pretty much go to bed and head out about 8:15-8:30 in the morning. I was commuting outward, and as someone new to the area, I foolishly assumed that Id be going opposite of traffic, and that it wouldnt be an issue. I was used to doing drop off and pick up from day care and I couldnt do that anymore. my toxic former employee is poisoning my staff, my employee blows up my phone with memes and videos even in the middle of the night and refuses to stop, VP is pressuring everyone into choreographed dances, boss eats while on the phone, and more, I got in trouble for using a mouse jiggler despite my excellent work, 10 impressive questions to ask in a job interview, my employee doesnt think were doing enough about bears at work, I caught my employee in a compromising position in the parking lot, employer only gives raises for promotions months later, and more. Much better. My dad worked in Anaheim, 10, maybe 15 minute drive from home. I currently live and work in LB and on a good day, its 7 minutes from door to door. I myself have had a 1.5 hour driving commute entirely within the NYC limits (Queens to the Bronx) because in NYC , its all very dependent on exactly where you live and work. They were choosing between two seemingly equal suburbs on opposite sides of the city. Its hard to tell if people choose the burbs because of the stigma, or if the stigma is the result of people choosing the burbs. not trying to say you should walk instead, just emphasizing how silly that time is!). Most people I work with have 20-30 minute commutes and think what I do is crazy but I guess its fine with me because a) my first career was in retail and Ill never do it again, not even for a 5 minute commute and b) Im an introverted homebody and dont have too many personal obligations that the commute would make me hate life. San Diego is still not that bad- like several have said- employers here are starting to get better about flexible start/end times to stagger traffic. You probably wont get this unless you commute in CA, did he say its the first day of spring? downtown Berkeley to downtown Oakland, or Oakland to SF). Evening commute (after 6 pm) is actually a little faster average is 45 minutes, up to 70 minutes. Barring any snow, crazy rain, etc. Of course, being able to just clock out and listen to music or something on the train is what makes it bearable. But I pay for that convenience. This is usually out of desperation or not grasping how the commute issues will effect you. These factors are 100% personal preference and might seem nuts to someone else, but its something Ill have to do almost everyday so I might as well not hate it. I mean because I've never had to do this drive on a regular basis for long periods of time. One parent leaves for work earlier so he or she can leave work early enough to pick up the kid. For people unfamiliar with the area, the SFV is northwest of LA (Los Angeles) while the SGV is northeast of LA. I live in New York, about 3.5 miles from my office. Human drivers lack the coordination and have too high reaction time to pull this off, so things inefficiently grind to a halt of roads. My sister drives even further, close to 60 miles, and her commute is about an hour. Good luck to you I hope you can find something without such a hard commute! Train is less stressful, but can be up to 2.5 hours if he misses a bullet train. There was no traffic. Having done both commutes I would take an LA commute over a Toronto one in a hot minute. I think thats my cutoff. In case you do think about moving: The first worst commute is Valley to west side, the second is San Gabriel Valley to Culver City area, and the third worst is south LA/Garden Grove/LB to anywhere north of DTLA, regardless of whether youre going east or west of DTLA. Here's what some on Reddit answered with: 1) User Banshee251- "It's doable. Now I live in Charlotte, NC, and my drive is 20 minutes (25 at the most.) needs and desires, not really about whats normal. Ha! So I worked from home on Wednesdays and that meant that I got a break from the 4 hours in the car mid-week. A "virtual" commute, so to speak. We are devastated in our office and yet, our site visitors from further south are like WTF, this isnt traffic. I have a 2 hour commute into Boston; I live in Providence. Spouse and I were in Bellevue before giving up and fleeing King County, and thoughts of 405 at rush hour, to and from Everett when one of us needed to catch the train north in the morning, still sends me into a cold sweat . I did take the bus up and back once when my car was in the shop. Hats off to those who can stand commuting long periods like that. Freeways everywhere, and theyre all jampacked. I was in a nice suburban low-rise before, and I could park & be at my desk in about 30 seconds. Now I dont even use half of it (but my Wifi at home is bad and so I dont want to get rid of it). If I hit traffic at the wrong time, it could take me 1.5-2 hrs to make what was normally a 25-30 minute drive. You just have to sit on a train for 2 hours each day. Its too bad you have a job where flex time or working from home would be very difficult! Like others have already said you have to do whats best for you and what you can tolerate. But youll figure it out. I live in the city and work in the FiDi and biked to work on a good day, depending on traffic and lights, I could be from my front door to the office in 10 minutes. (None of this is easy in LA, but its the only solution for long-term happiness.) Sure that day might suck but you have to do what you have to do. Even if it is closer/more flexible. I actually took a pay cut for a job where I now walk to the bus stop in my front yard and it takes 20 min. Yeah, if that was the tone, that sucks. Swore would never do commute into London again! Well the freeway goes over the Columbiaunless they create a much taller bridge it has to be a drawbridge. We plan on moving closer to my husbands work as soon as we hit the 2 year mark of owning our condo and can sell it without being taxed. With construction on I-5 and 99? I think the longest commute I have ever had was 45 minutes to an hour (once driving and once by subway). We just moved to Atlanta a year ago, and when searching for a place to live, every time I found a possibility I plugged it into Google directions and set it to find the route from there to my and my partners workplaces at the times wed be driving. They each left in the morning, driving an hour in opposite directions. Dallas area 10 min commute here and the commute was a huge factor in our decision to buy in this area. When its not, though. My commute one way is 1-2 hours depending on traffic conditions and weather from the heart of downtown to the Woodlands. So I would draw the line at 1 hour from door to door for driving commute. By bus (three buses total) it takes an hour. Good luck! Seattle traffic is getting so bad, Tacoma to Seattle can be easily 2+ hours, both ways. Especially 2 hours in bad traffic. That being said, my husband isnt from here and will not commute more than 30 min. Weve been to LA on vacation several times and the traffic was a nightmare even when it wasnt rush hour. On not so good days (every day except Mondays), its more like 2-2.5 hours. Tons of accidents that cause lane closures and rubbernecking? My longest commute was when I first started working, and it was just over an hour each way. At least 2-3 times per week. So its totally reasonable for you to find a new job. Folks drive at the limit or (more often) 10-15 miles over limit when theres room to do so. Its terrifying how easily delays can whipcrack along a chain of traffic. I think a long commute driving wears on you much much more than,say, public transit where you can work on other things. Hey, fellow Washingtonians! (Spoiler, the answer is yesnot that anyone who has driven on congested hwys didnt already know this). I cannot imagine having to actively drive for that entire time through jam-packed traffic! My commute is 12 miles. On his work-at-home days I really like the bus. We used to live the next county over, and our commute was easily 45+ minutes (including daycare dropoff). Every place might be accessible by public transport at some point during the day. Brea, Yorba Linda and Anaheim Hills just have freeways. So its really just not a place for people who struggle with patience with that sort of thing. Interestingly enough, the only sketchy/uncomfortable experience Ive EVER had on LA Metro was on the Expo line late at night on the weekend. I would be so thrilled if public transit was ever an option! More people here commute than dont, even from places like Riverside to LA. Google Mythbusters can a traffic jam form from a driver tapping their brakes. Patch up the seats if necessary. 14 minutes of it. 2 years ago, my husband and I bought a house in the Pittsburgh burbs and we both commute into the city. Two deer and two totaled cars in less than a year. A long commute is possible, of course, as your father says, but the difference between commuting to school and commuting to work is that when you get home, you still have to study, unlike you're father. My old job used to get us to commute to a neighbouring city a couple of times a week- 1.5-2 hours each way. I learned that I am not good with long commutes so I have always chosen to live fairly close to where I work (in the same town). Im on the east coast and one of my previous jobs was a minimum 45 min. No thanks! Two hours feels like more than I could stand as a daily thing even with audiobooks, but I really cant recommend audiobooks (and podcasts) enough for relieving the stress of commuting to work. I lived in an RV for a few months. Obviously youll have outliers, including the OP at the moment. I would keep in mind if the route takes you through rush hour traffic, if it does that normal 2 hour drive might become 3. My old boss could not figure out why I hate my 2 hours commute vs his 2 hour commute; mine was all stop and go traffic, his was open highway. Local commuting friends report anywhere from 30 minutes to 1.25 hours. Have you tested the 2 hours on google maps? I probably massively bore my friends lately by pushing audiobooks and going on about my favourites. For the right job, I once commuted 3 hours a day (round trip) and 150 miles a day. A 2 hour commute is normal in any big city. bah! I got you beat. Keep your fingers crossed for me please! I now live and work in the same borough of NYC. If other people want to live like that, thats fine, but I did not. 4) See if you boss will allow a much later arrival when it rains. 3 Strategies for Surviving a Long Commute. Weve got kids and paying 2k+/month for a 2 bed apartment anywhere within 45 minutes wasnt happening. Its normal if you live in the Valley and work in West LA. On days where I have to drive through morning commute traffic to get to appointments and such, it makes me CRAZY. It made a huge difference for me. It doesnt really matter what your boyfriend thinks is normal if thats simply unsustainable for you. my boss wants me to lie to coworkers about my commute, my employer moved our office to an inconvenient location. My home is only 31 miles away from my office, and my commute takes me 1.5 hours door to door on a good day (no railroad or subway issues). Sitting in a car for 2 hours and driving 15 miles per hour for 2 hours are totally different things. I still have trouble with long drives because I find them exhausting, and its been 3.5 years. I was just thinking about my comment, and it occurred to me that my shorter commutes are going to work only. You are crossing the ENTIRE LA metropolitan area no matter how you cut it. More time to read & crochet. Oh, well be able to visit Griffith Park, no problem well, we visited it, but it took a lot longer than expected. But that same commute on Friday afternoon will take two hours. It is a fantastic way to start the day, and you can skip the gym. Thank goodness for small Midwestern cities! When I lived in Chicago, I commuted reverse from just south of downtown to a suburb out by the airport, and it was routinely 2 1/2 hours one way. My best friend had a 2-hour commute. Luckily for me, when I am in Sunnyvale, my commute is only 10 minutes door to door. Itll go down to 40 minutes when shes in college. A friend posted a listing for the house next door to her in a nice neighborhood in the DC area yesterday the same house here would be 1.5-2 x the price, and would be on a much smaller lot. For me the cost of living is a trade off I am willing to take to not spend my life commuting. I do all my decompressing in my car and I drive 45 minutes out of my way to shop in peace as well, so Im just a big ol crazy pants wanderer. I didnt mind that it took an hour, because of course it did. With the right game plan, "mega-commuters" can improve their daily journey. When I lived in New York I knew people who commuted in from the suburbs, and it generally took them about 2 hours. Now luckily I have flexibility, otherwise theres no way I could make this work. Id probably do better with it now (better car, with a/c that actually works right, more patience), but its been 15 years, and I still hate driving north on the 5 (I drive to Disneyland, my husband drives home. (Okay, its usually 5-10 minutes to walk to the train/grab coffee, 30-45 minutes on the train to Hoboken, then either PATH to my office (~10-20 minutes, then walking 10 minutes) or Citibike (~5 minutes on light rail, ~15 minutes biking, 5 minutes walking). Its not common but, sadly, is becoming more common. Now Ive got to badge into a parking garage, park, walk across the street, take an escalator, badge into the right access area of the office complex, take an elevator, badge into the office with my 3rd badge, and use a key for my companys office space. On days with very light traffic (aka bank holidays), going a steady 45-55 mph the whole way, it would take me about 45 mins. Agreed, although theres a huge class element to commutes. I actually have no idea how far it is to most of the places I go regularly, just how long it takes to get there at various times of the day. Id say the job I had with a 20-minute car commute and the one with the 45-minute bus ride were about at the same stress level. Thats a horrifying commute. Ive had a long-ish commute (45min to 1 hr) for years and finally discovered the joy of audiobooks about 6 months ago (as a lifelong bibliophile, I dont know what took me so long). Once a week should be quite manageable. Once we live 20 min from his work, he can be responsible for drop off or pick up (or both!!! by foot : 30 minutes I used to have a 65 minute commute for my first professional job. I ignored that rule in ex job and spent four years regretting it when I had a 90 minute commute each way that occasionally stretched to 2 hours (thank you and goodnight South Western railway). In most metro areas, thatll mean much, much higher housing costs. Where in OC? I always walk him before I leave and immediately when I get home. So has anyone had the experience of such a long commute? Now doing Reading-North Oxford and its 1.5-2 hours each way door to door. Thirty miles was an hour and a half commuting time on the bus in the HOV lanes and it was so stressful. If it were by bus I might not feel the same way, but Ive never had to deal with that. After work hours? It turned out the new commute was longer but with less city traffic. If you otherwise like your job, is moving closer to work an option? The city was definitely designed with cars in mind and commuting by bike would be a nightmare. My commute is probably 45 min door to door. Right now, I work from home, but the longest commute I can reasonably handle is 30 minutes. (I was born and raised in LA but now live in Santa Barbara; we have traffic jams at rush hour now too but of LA strengthyet.). And, if theres a train incident, then these days, theres always WFH for part of the day. Then we start up again. I found a radio station with bible studies, so I listened to that. Before I moved to LA, [Official Local Representatives] swore to me that the traffic was exaggerated and every place was accessible by public transport. But hes got a scooter so at least doesnt have to change trains 5 times. Commutes in more congested cities are like that, unfortunately. I currently live between OC and LA and love where I am its cheap, quiet, pretty and all my friends are here. I just want to point out that normal doesnt mean anything if youre suffering so much. When I was commuting 45 minutes on my bike, even in wintry conditions, I had other young and healthy friends who said I dont understand how you can bike that far, I would never but ultimately I enjoyed it. no thank you) I started shooting out my resume last week and immediately hooked a few fish, so Im a lot less worried now. I once had a job where, about a month after I arrived, my boss decided instead of working on the main site (lovely building, 10-minute walk from my flat, in a fun, vibrant city), Id spend 80% of my time at an alternative site. Its not just the length of the drive; its also how stressful it is, and sitting in traffic is always stressful. And then there is the increased wear and tear on your car and the associated costs. Agreed, I live in LA and while 2 hours seems to be pushing it a bit, at least a third of my office has a 1.5 hr commute. Depending on where LW lives and works, its likely that there arent direct routes AND that even if there were, it could increase commuting time by an hour (easily). -Check accidents before you leave to go home. Their two major functions are to suck up money and kill mobility. Eventually, I moved in with my now-husband and my commute went to 11 miles/35 minutes (unless something was going on at the Hollywood Bowl and I forgot to take an alternate exit then it was 50). Which went on for well over a year on the stretch of road I was commuting on? I knew it was bad, but to witness it, wow. OP is far from an outlier, but it doesnt mean she HAS to keep up a brutal drive like that. Thursday and Friday afternoons going northbound (away from NYC ) is the worst. If you drive from the beach to our house (5 miles) during traffic it can easily take over an hour. It worked for a while (about 3 years), but only because all the stars were aligned to make it feasible: my husband also worked long hours, we didnt have kids, I could travel much of the distance on bus/train and indulge my love of reading en route, and I loved the job. I realize its a bit hyperbolic but almost nobody (relatively speaking) has a home in Los Angeles (city) they live in thousands of surrounding communities in the greater LA area and where you live has a lot of class distinctions. But a 2 hour commute in LA is not at all unusual. Without him around, I had to quit my job to take care of the baby. I know people who commute from Napa to Oakland, or Sacramento to San Francisco. My current commute is about an hour but most of it is by train. Doh! I live on the East Coast and my commute is about 15 miles and takes me 20 minutes. The patterns would be a little kinder. The best thing I could find to do was use alternate county backroads to get home once I got off the beltwayit doesnt get me home any faster but as I tell my husband, its the illusion of getting home faster because at least Im constantly moving and not killing my knees pumping the brakes! You can absolutely take the M train from Bushwick to Broadway-Lafayette in under 45 minutes. We have to take the dreaded 91, but since theres 3+ people in the van, we get to use the 91 toll lanes for free. The answer to that question is no. Oh, I agree! Not a thing I could do about it. i would quit immediately (if moving is not an option). I also have trouble waking up in the mornings and have a pretty bad sense of how long certain things (showering, making coffee) will take me, so Im not cut out for getting up earlier to avoid traffic. That's train, tube, walk and drive to the station. Ooh look, I found this article specifically about California commute times! Its not smart comedy in quite the same vein as those, but the No Such Thing as a Fish podcast is wonderful. Good luck with your job search, OP, and good luck to all of those struggling with a commute that makes you scream! Buses all the way. That does seem excessive, especially given the distance. Morning commute averages 40 minutes, can be as short as 30 and as long as 75. Im an Airbnb host. Going home is just the same thing in reverse. I could leave at a certain time and usually expect that everything would work out, but sometimes the world said Nah, lets make a car careen off the road today.. Its baffling to me, even coming from Boston where 93 is notoriously slow. I looked at a job offer in Beverly Hills, and though it would have paid more, the only ways for me to get there were: Get horror and comedy with My Favorite Murder! While I was doing this, there were some people from National Office (DC area), whose commutes were up to 2 1/2 hours (ugh! Plus, its Florida and OP is in southern California, so I doubt that we could survive the heat (not to mention the frequent summer rainstorms here in the summer). Many people here complain about long commutes, even those that use public transportation to get to and from work. I loved my neighborhood when I first moved to DCI was near Shaw, and it was amazing: I was right across the street from a great bar, cool restaurants in easy walking distance, and I loved the architecture. An excellent point! Like the OP, Im a former New Yorker, and my 45-minute subway or bus commute felt like nothing because I didnt have to be so engaged. The 20 minute subway ride OP describes from Bushwick to Soho is only about 6-7 miles. They just need to step up their game on safety. Someone mentioned Santa Monica above you would be hard pressed to find a 1-bedroom apartment for under $2000 a month. I ended up moving out earlier than I had planned because I couldnt handle it. Sometimes I forget why the rest of the nation hates us. Seattle area traffic is horrific. Im basically paying extra rent so I can park my car closer to work (in my driveway). A lot of people, a lot of cars, not a lot of trains, and limited road options because of the terrain. I live in SW CT so the only reason my drive is doable is because I stay off (and away from) 95. I worked all week and basically slept all weekend because I was so exhausted. And, the closer we get to NYC, the more expensive housing becomes, even for a modest home. She doesnt visit the coast much I see, lol. I wish you luck adjusting your circumstances to something that works for you! I know its not entirely the same but I avoid situations where I potentially could be harmed I know its somewhat over the top. Even 1-2 days a week avoiding that mess can make you feel a lot better. No matter what normal is, you have to go with whats feasible for you. Not your fault/Its normal to be a bit nave about a new city. Of course, thats me living out in a rural area, heading into the state capital and downtown. Since there are only so many routes, that is the main pinch point. Our population has outpaced transit infrastructure loading, LA did not invest in public transit earlier, and theres an effective moratorium on building more freeways on the west side and in City of LA (and its adjoining communities). I would text my friend/workers a picture of myself sitting on my couch at 5:20, while they were still at the subway stop. You move closer to your work, or work closer to your house. I hear Atlanta is even worse. 2 to 2.5 hour commutes are long even by our standards, but not unheard of. It really helped me rule out some areas that were lovely and that I had enjoyed visiting on weekends but were misery to get to after work. for about a year i commuted an hour to work and i did get used to it but i wouldnt choose to go back to doing that. My commute in Sacramento is 20-30 minutes average. Getting home in the afternoons could take anywhere from 1.5 3 hours. The 2 hours doesnt surprise me at all. At one point, my ATL commute was 2 hours each way, and that was a bit much. Its miserable and I understand completely! But driving, I dont want to spend more than an hour a day in the car. Eh. I know most people would love that, but living that close to work would stress me out (not being able to disconnect, running into people after hours, etc.). Some days when Im apartment hunting, Ill see listings like $1300/mo for a 500 sq ft studio apartment above a garage, no stove and its really demoralizing. Also, it looks like the Blue Line will be temporarily shut down. The Bay has faster commutes than SoCal, in part because theres more commuter rails and theres more carpooling and carpool incentives). This is another challenge when the peak of rush hour doesnt actually end. I live in The New Forest and work in London which is a 2 hour drive and I sometimes do it twice a week. All I can offer is sympathy. That was enough for us. I think just having parents around to babysit at short notice, and actually being able to do things in the evenings occasionally with my partner would be amazing. I live in a city with ample pubic transit, but I prefer to drive. 05-01-2023 2.
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